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Raising Body Positive Children

Raising Body Positive Children

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Busy Mom's Starter Guide to Making Peace with Food
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We all want our kiddos to feel comfortable in their bodies, but we can’t always protect them from the cultural messaging and outside voices implying that there is a right and wrong way to eat. And for those of us who struggle with eating and body image disorders ourselves, there is the added worry that we might pass these issues on to our children. So, what can we do to raise body positive children with the confidence and autonomy to practice intuitive eating?

Karen Diaz is a registered dietitian certified in intuitive eating. She earned her BS in Dietetics from James Madison University in 2001 and completed her internship at the Cornell Campus of New York—Presbyterian Hospital in 2003. Karen spent several years working as a clinical dietician in the nutrition department at The Renfrew Center, one of the leading centers for eating disorder treatment on the East Coast, before creating The Free Life, a platform designed to support women in overcoming eating and body image disorders. She is also the author of Within: Making Peace with Food and Body Image to Create a Healthy Family and Home.

On this episode of The Embodied & Well Mom Show, Karen joins us to discuss the challenges moms (and parents) face in judging ourselves when it comes to body image and food. She shares the two overarching themes from her book on confronting eating and body image disorders, building yourself up first—and then opening a dialogue with your children. Karen also describes the value in developing a Family Manifesto around food and learning to practice ‘appreciative looking.’ Listen in for Karen’s insight on talking to your kids about cultural messaging and learn her top strategies for raising body positive children!

Key Takeaways

 

What inspired Karen to specialize in eating disorders

  • Addiction issues in family, friend with eating disorder
  • 8 years in nutrition department at eating disorder clinic

How we judge ourselves around body image + food

  • Rules make it hard to be active participant in relationship
  • Remove mom-guilt that we caused child’s issues

The two overarching themes in Karen’s book Within

  1. Build self up so strong that diet culture crumbles at feet
  2. Open dialogue in home to address struggles

Karen’s Family Manifesto around food

  • Set of beliefs, e.g.: food shouldn’t be reward
  • Don’t judge other families for different values

The value in facilitating an open dialogue on body image

  • Ask questions to let kids be heard
  • Avoid bringing own worries into conversation

The concept of appreciative looking

  • Look at photographs 3X, find something like
  • Learn to see self in different way

Karen’s advice on shifting negative cultural messages

  • YOU determine your environment
  • Choose foods that taste good, feel good for you

How to educate your kids on cultural messaging

  • Point out lack of size diversity
  • Discuss shows with personality based on body size

Karen’s insight on talking to preteens about body image

  • Proactive strategies (i.e.: write letters to parts of body)
  • Don’t panic about phases, doctor’s comments

Connect with Karen

The Free Life

Karen on Facebook

Karen on Twitter

Karen on Pinterest

Within: Making Peace with Food and Body Image to Create a Healthy Family and Home by Karen Diaz RD

 

Connect with Lindsay

 

Intuitive Eating Moms

Embodied & Well Mom Show on Facebook

Lindsay on Instagram

Lindsay on Pinterest

Lindsay on Twitter

Lindsay on LinkedIn

 

Resources

 

Wendy Yalom Photography

Responsive Feeding & “Picky Eating”

Responsive Feeding & “Picky Eating”

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Busy Mom's Starter Guide to Making Peace with Food
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Parents receive conflicting messages about feeding. We’re told that getting the right nutrients is incredibly important to our child’s health and wellbeing. Then, we’re told that we should simply offer our kids food and let them decide whether and how much to eat. So, how do we follow both sets of advice? The fact is, nutrition is the result of a trusting feeding relationship, and if you can learn to appreciate your kiddo’s presentation and respond to their cues, you can achieve a stress-free mealtime.

Grace Wong is a certified eating disorder registered dietitian with 15 years of clinical experience in mental health and pediatric nutrition. Grace works with a diverse presentation of feeding and eating disorders and supports children with co-existing conditions like ADHD, autism, sensory processing challenges, anxiety, depression, addiction and trauma. She is committed to helping clients uncover their family feeding history and establish a comfortable environment at mealtime. Grace’s practice is based in Calgary, and she does online coaching through her Facebook business page.

Today, Grace joins us to explain how she supports parents whose kids have complex feeding presentations. She discusses the concept of food acceptance, sharing her aim to get children to a place where variety is not disruptive and her approach to establishing a peaceful mealtime. Listen in for Grace’s insight on the challenges of parenting neuro-diverse kiddos and learn how to appreciate your child’s feeding presentation and build a trusting feeding relationship!

Key Takeaways

 

How Grace supports parents whose kids eat differently

  • Don’t treat child as ‘problem’
  • Learn story, family feeding history
  • Identify cause of current challenges
  • Move child closer to natural trajectory

The tenets of division of responsibility in feeding

  • Parents responsible for when, what and where
  • Children responsible for whether, how much

The concept of responsive eating

  • Relationship rather than set of rules
  • Read child’s cues, respond appropriately

Grace’s insight on the idea of food acceptance

  • Limited diet grows with experience
  • Get to a place where variety not disruptive

The conflicting message parents receive re: feeding

  • Nutrition important, necessary for wellbeing
  • Offer children food and let them decide

How Grace works to establish a peaceful mealtime

  • Collect story and identify stressors
  • Give child autonomy to choose or remove
  • Address concerns (e.g.: anxiety, appetite)
  • Make meals safe + comfortable

The challenges of parenting neuro-diverse children

  • Shaming or judgment from friends, family
  • Kids employ masking to appear normal
  • Increases anxiety, creates more aversion

Grace’s advice on appreciating your child’s presentation

  • Develop trusting feeding relationship
  • Outcome = nutrition, peace with food

Connect with Grace

 

Grace on Facebook

 

Connect with Lindsay

 

Intuitive Eating Moms

Embodied & Well Mom Show on Facebook

Lindsay on Instagram

Lindsay on Pinterest

Lindsay on Twitter

Lindsay on LinkedIn

 

Resources

 

Ellen Satter’s Division of Responsibility

Dr. Katja Rowell

My Kid Has a Food Allergy and I Need Support

My Kid Has a Food Allergy and I Need Support

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Busy Mom's Starter Guide to Making Peace with Food
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If you have a child with a newly diagnosed food allergy, you are likely consumed with learning as much as you can to keep your kiddo safe and healthy. This may also mean that you are neglecting your own self-care in order to take on the extra responsibility of eliminating allergens from your home and meeting with daycare providers and school administrators to develop a plan for your child. What can you do to take care of yourself during this challenging time?

Diana Rice, RD, is a nationally recognized nutrition professional and family health expert. She is passionate about communicating effective and evidence-based strategies that incorporate good nutrition into the challenges of modern-day life. Prior to launching her consultancy, Diana served as the Associate Director of Nutrition Communications at The Monday Campaigns, where she spearheaded the Kids Cook Monday initiative. Now she focuses on perinatal, infant and child nutrition, and food allergies, working directly with families to implement practical strategies for improved health. Diana is also a frequent contributor to national media publications, including Parents, The Huffington Post, and Everyday Health, among many others.

Today, Diana joins us to describe how a child’s food allergy diagnosis impacts the entire family. She shares the professional advice around introducing allergens early and often, explaining the ‘mom guilt’ she felt for not doing everything she could to reduce her own child’s risk. Diana also walks us through the steps she took to manage her daughter’s allergy to peanuts and tree nuts and offers advice for parents on reaching out for the support you need. Listen in for Diana’s insight into why food allergies are so much more complex than simply eliminating a particular food from your diet—and learn how to advocate for your child AND take care of yourself as an allergy mom!

Key Takeaways

 

Diana’s transition to motherhood

  • Smooth process with first daughter (support network)
  • Relocated when second daughter just 3 weeks old
  • Started to slack on self-care, developed anxiety

Diana’s second daughter’s health issues

  • Introduced potential allergens ‘early and often’
  • Diagnosis of allergy to peanuts and tree nuts

How Diana responded to her daughter’s food allergies

  • Eliminate foods manufactured on shared lines
  • Meetings with daycare providers, school
  • Research around brands with dedicated facilities

The professional advice around introducing allergens

  • Prompted by study of Israeli kids in UK and Israel
  • Introduce potential allergens early to reduce risk

Diana’s mom guilt around her daughter’s allergies

  • Couldn’t say ‘did everything I could’
  • Tell self that your best is enough

The responsibility of managing a child’s food allergies

  • Challenge usually falls to mom
  • Focus on child’s needs AND own self-care

Diana’s insight on navigating your child’s food allergies

  • Recognize that diagnosis affects whole family
  • Get support you need (e.g.: therapist, dietician)

Diana’s advice for parents of children with allergies

  • Identify anxiety triggers (i.e.: grocery shopping)
  • Connect with other allergy parents
  • Set aside time to dig through info
  • Talk through concerns with partner

How parents of kids without allergies can provide support

  1. Understand risks of cross-contamination
  2. Respect school policies re: outside food
  3. Cultivate empathy for families with food allergies
  4. Don’t give child food without parent permission
  5. Celebrate with non-food alternatives (e.g.: stickers)

Diana’s top tip for food allergy moms

  • There’s no shame in being ‘that mom’
  • You deserve to advocate for family’s health

 

Connect with Diana

 

Diana’s Website

Diana’s Facebook Group – Self-Care for Allergy Moms

Diana on Instagram

Diana on Twitter

Diana on Pinterest

Diana on Facebook

Connect with Lindsay

 

Intuitive Eating Moms

Nutrition Instincts – San Diego Nutrition Therapy

Embodied & Well Mom Show on Facebook

Lindsay on Instagram

Lindsay on Pinterest

Lindsay on Twitter

Lindsay on LinkedIn

 

Resources

 

Born to Eat: Whole, Healthy Foods from Baby’s First Bite by Wendy Jo Peterson and Leslie Schilling

Peanut Allergy Study in Israel vs. the UK

Diana’s Halloween Food Allergy Article

https://www.healthychildren.org/English/healthy-living/nutrition/Pages/Food-Allergies-in-Children.aspx

https://www.aap.org/en-us/about-the-aap/aap-press-room/aap-press-room-media-center/Pages/Food-Allergies-Babies-at-High-Risk.aspx

https://www.aap.org/en-us/about-the-aap/aap-press-room/Pages/Approximately-8-Percent-of-Children-are-Diagnosed-with-Food-Allergies.aspx

 

Dr. Linda Shanti’s interview for her It’s Not About the Baby Weight Summit!

Dr. Linda Shanti’s interview for her It’s Not About the Baby Weight Summit!

It’s Not About the Baby Weight Online Summit from Lindsay Stenovec on Vimeo.

SIGN UP FOR LINDA’S FREE ONLINE SUMMIT TODAY!

IT’S NOT ABOUT THE BABY WEIGHT – RECOVERY MAMA SUMMIT

During pregnancy and postpartum, your relationship with food changes and your body transforms. This shift is challenging for nearly all new moms, but if you have a history of anxiety, depression, or an eating disorder, that adds another layer of complexity to an already difficult process. So, what kind of support do you need if you are in recovery as you transition into motherhood?

Dr. Linda Shanti is a licensed clinical psychologist in private practice in San Francisco. She specializes in recovery from eating disorders, body image challenges, anxiety, postpartum depression, and new mom support. Linda is also a well-known speaker and author of the book The Recovery Mama Guide to Your Eating Disorder Recovery in Pregnancy and Postpartum. With 20 years of experience in the realm of compulsive eating, emotional eating, binge eating, bulimia, and anorexia, she is committed to helping women leverage expressive arts, mindfulness, and compassionate mirroring to support recovery in pregnancy and postpartum.

On this episode of The Embodied & Well Mom Show, Linda joins us to explain the proactive approach she took to get support during her own pregnancy, discussing the way her anxiety presented as irritability, anger, and hypervigilance. She shares her experience with both food and body image during pregnancy and postpartum and describes how she supports women in decoding the myths around ‘getting your body back.’ Listen in to understand Linda’s approach to working with new moms in recovery—and learn to quiet your overdeveloped self-critic in favor of self-compassion!

Key Takeaways

 

Linda’s proactive approach to getting support during her own pregnancy

  • Brought up history of anxiety, eating disorder at first appointment
  • Surprised by irritable depression, rage and hypervigilance

The challenge of supporting a partner with irritable depression

  • Looks like pushing away, want to be alone

Linda’s experience with food during pregnancy and postpartum

  • Disconcerting ravenous hunger
  • Nausea in first trimester (calmed by eating)

Linda’s experience with body image during pregnancy

  • Drastic hormonal shifts led to BIG feelings
  • Fun to have baby bump in middle of process
  • Very rough at end, ‘carting around boulder’

How Linda supports clients around postpartum body image

  • Work through grief process
  • Decode myths re: diet culture, getting body back

How Linda works with moms in recovery from eating disorders

  • Reframe independence as interdependence
  • Address overdeveloped self-critic
  • Reassess schedule, lower the bar on expectations

Linda’s advice for overachieving first-time moms

  • You will come back, have time to self again

Connect with Linda

 

Linda’s Website

Recovery Mama on Instagram

Recovery Mam on Facebook

 

Connect with Lindsay

 

Intuitive Eating Moms

Embodied & Well Mom Show on Facebook

Lindsay on Instagram

Lindsay on Pinterest

Lindsay on Twitter

Lindsay on LinkedIn

 

Resources

 

The Recovery Mama Guide to Your Eating Disorder Recovery in Pregnancy and Postpartum by Linda Shanti McCabe

 

How to Be a Good Enough Mother with Corinne Crossley, LMHC and Jessica Foley, LMHC, LPCC

How to Be a Good Enough Mother with Corinne Crossley, LMHC and Jessica Foley, LMHC, LPCC

We all want to be good moms, so we set the bar high. In fact, our expectations are SO elevated that we end up neglecting ourselves in order to put the baby first. But what if the moments we think of as mom fails are actually beneficial to our kiddos? What if ‘good enough mothering’ is a good thing for our families? What if—sometimes—it’s okay just to show up?

Corinne Crossley is a psychotherapist and mother of two whose practice focuses on helping people heal their relationships with their bodies. She holds a master’s in Counseling Psychology from Lesley University. Jessica Foley is a licensed mental health and professional clinical counselor whose practice centers around supporting women in developing a healthy relationship with their bodies. She earned her master’s in Clinical Mental Health Counseling from Lesley University. Together, Jessica and Corinne host the Momma Bites! Podcast to help moms eat mindfully ‘one animal cracker at a time.’

 

Today, Jessica and Corinne join us to explain how they came to work with moms and share the common struggles among their client base. They discuss how guilt and perfectionism lead moms to neglect themselves—especially when it comes to eating. Jessica introduces the concept of ‘good enough mothering’ and Corinne offers insight around giving yourself permission to do less. Listen in for advice on reassessing your basic needs and learn how failing in manageable ways can actually benefit your kids!

 

Key Takeaways

 

Jessica’s path to working with moms

  • Focus on women (mental, reproductive health)
  • First mom client struggled with mood disruption
  • Trained with The Postpartum Stress Center

 

Corinne’s path to working with moms

  • First client struggled with binge eating disorder
  • Becoming mom changed experience of work
  • Focus on how take care of bodies as parents

 

What issues moms are struggling with most

  • Guilt and perfectionism
  • Postpartum anxiety
  • Body image

 

How these common struggles show up

  • Moms neglect selves (eating first to go)
  • See eating as something we must earn
  • Use food to supplement other needs

 

Jessica & Corrine’s advice for moms with self-care challenges

  • Reassess basics and get support
  • Cultivate self-compassion
  • Set intention for self-care
  • Give self permission to do LESS

 

The idea of ‘good enough mothering’

  • Coined by researcher DW Winnicott
  • Benefits to manageable failure
  • Sometimes okay to just show up

 

How to adjust your expectations based on the circumstances

  • What’s good enough in this moment?
  • No ‘perfect,’ just what’s right for you
  • Foster flexibility in thinking
  • Pay attention to what’s good

 

The benefits around failing in manageable ways

  • Promotes independence and trust
  • Kids have different perception of ‘failure’

 

Check out Momma Bites!

Show Notes

Intuitive Eating Moms Club

 

Connect with Jessica & Corinne

Momma Bites!

Mindful Eating Moms on Twitter

Mindful Eating Moms on Instagram

Mindful Eating Moms on Facebook

Corinne’s Website

Jessica’s Website

Jessica on Twitter

Jessica on Facebook

Jessica on Instagram

 

Connect with Lindsay

 

Intuitive Eating Moms

Embodied & Well Mom Show on Facebook

Lindsay on Instagram

Lindsay on Pinterest

Lindsay on Twitter

Lindsay on LinkedIn

 

Resources

 

Lindsay on Momma Bites

Karen Kleiman

Postpartum Stress Center

Boston OBGYN

Dr. Linda Shanti

Winnicott Research Study

Harlow Monkey Study

Present Over Perfect: Leaving Behind Frantic for a Simpler, More Soulful Way of Living by Shauna Niequist

‘A Normal Day’ Video

 

How to Use Yoga to Support your Motherhood Journey (without studios or expensive pants)

How to Use Yoga to Support your Motherhood Journey (without studios or expensive pants)


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We’d greatly appreciate a podcast rating and review so that we can reach more mamas and families!
Every mom needs more help than we get. But if you’re a new mom struggling with anxiety and depression, it can be difficult to reach out for support. With or without a diagnosis of PMADs, you deserve help—and yoga therapy may provide just the tools you need to address any physical or emotional imbalances you are experiencing. The best part? Much of it can be done while you’re holding a baby or lying down. No mat required.

Suzannah Neufeld is a licensed psychotherapist and certified yoga therapist in private practice out of the Bay Area. She has 15 years of experience supporting people coping with eating disorders, body image concerns, anxiety, and pregnancy and early parenthood. Suzannah speaks regularly on the topics of eating disorders, body image, perinatal mood disorders, and yoga therapy for organizations like the California Association of Marriage and Family Therapists, Postpartum Support International, and About-Face. Her first book, Awake at 3 a.m.: Yoga Therapy for Anxiety and Depression in Pregnancy and Early Motherhood, was published in 2018.

 

Today, Suzannah joins us to share her definition of yoga, discussing the difference between its true intention and how it’s been marketed in Western culture. She offers her take on the idea of self-care and explains why she advocates for responsiveness to your body instead. Suzannah also addresses what she calls the ‘all-natural mandate’ and the judgement and shame pregnant women and new moms feel around food. Listen in for Suzannah’s insight on the distinction between PMADs and the baby blues, the value in researching therapists before the baby comes, and how she leverages yoga therapy to help moms with anxiety and depression.

 

Key Takeaways

 

Suzannah’s definition of yoga

  • Practices to connect body, heart and mind
  • Provide clarity and meaningful existence

 

The 3 key components of Suzannah’s practice

  1. Breathing techniques—pranayama
  2. Movement/postures—asanas
  3. Philosophical tools (e.g.: inward focus, compassion)

 

The true intention of yoga

  • Not about certain body type, structure
  • Dropping into body to access freedom

 

Suzannah’s take on the idea of self-care

  • Focus on self disregards community as source
  • Activities often require time or money

 

Why Suzannah advocates for responsiveness to your body

  • Act on need to rest, relationship with food
  • Yoga affords opportunity to learn to listen

 

The difference between PMADs and the baby blues

  • Distinction in duration, severity of symptoms
  • Emotional, behavioral and thought indicators

 

Suzannah’s insight on creating a postpartum plan

  • Deserve help with or without diagnosis
  • Interview therapists while pregnant

 

How PMADs might show up in unexpected ways

  • Anxiety (normal vs. interfering)
  • Rage that makes you ashamed

 

How Suzannah uses yoga to help moms with PMADs

  • Get present in body, notice areas of tension
  • Address imbalances with poses or practices
  • Many can be done holding baby, lying down

 

Suzannah’s view of the ‘all-natural mandate’

  • Perception that yoga means eating clean
  • Judgement that hurting baby if don’t
  • Another way of policing women’s bodies

 

How to recover from shame around food

  • Do what’s right for you, find support
  • Know people will say unhelpful things

 

Suzannah’s top advice around yoga and mental health

  • Medication can be helpful (not ‘easy way out’)
  • Yoga won’t fix, but will provide solace

 

 

 

Connect with Suzannah

Suzannah’s Website

Suzannah on Facebook

Suzannah on Twitter

Suzannah on Instagram

SPONSOR:

Intuitive Eating Moms Club

Non-diet wellness made simple for moms.

December’s Topic:

A Mindful You!

A month dedicated to establishing a mindfulness practice and using it to support your eating (and life) experiences.

LEARN MORE

 

Resources Mentioned in the Episode:

 

Awake at 3 a.m.: Yoga Therapy for Anxiety and Depression in Pregnancy and Early Motherhood by Suzannah Neufeld

Body Full of Stars: Female Rage and My Passage into Motherhood by Molly Caro May

Nancy Bardacke

Mindful Birthing: Training the Mind, Body, and Heart for Childbirth and Beyond by Nancy Bardacke

Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction

Jon Kabat-Zinn

Yoga Rising: 30 Empowering Stories from Yoga Renegades for Every Body by Melanie C. Klein

Yoga and Body Image Coalition

Yoga and Body Image: 25 Personal Stories About Beauty, Bravery & Loving Your Body by Melanie C. Klein

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